Friday, January 5, 2018

I lost my best friend
To betrayal
To a lie
Of love
I'm sick
Rather die
Than keep waking up
Under her sky
Considering suicide

Tuesday, January 2, 2018

New year new me

Some days 
The sky just opens up 
And shits on everyone
Life works the same way
Today maybe the day
Tommrow not so much

Luck is a thing
Not a thing to be worshipped or followed
Just know its there
Hope it favors you
Or anyone 

Up down
Cycle around 
Same old ever changing winless game

Life sucks most of the time
Mostly
But every now and then it sells up
Into something else
You know it when you see everyone else looking at it

Something like you
Head turning cataclysm worth noting

I miss you
I will always miss you
I loved you
Hurt is still hurt
It still hurts 
Will pain and ache 

Promise after betrayed dishonest
My rub my own
Faults selflessly self inflicted
Choice to let you
Allow entrance
Provide inevitable opportunity
To destroy me

It was always my fault
Always what I asked for
Always the lie I told myself
That you were true
Truely mine
True love
Divine
Anything but the reality that our love was nothing 
Less than nothing
Another memory not worth a recollection
Another pretty mistake

An ode to no one

In lost we found
Sold
Soiled
Sacred
Love making

With
Or Without
Sound

Time stood by us
Defined lust
Watched hopeful
the hopeless
Dull quick
Mispoken

By tossed together
Weathered
Fate wielding severe
To not be together
Not ever

By lost we found
Not the want
Not the planned plot
Dreamnt

Pursued

Forgot




Friday, December 15, 2017

When I got old, It was already too late. When I was young, I couldnt tell you much. Still lady luck blessed me. With a curse to crave love. Love I did. Many times. Each time more real. Deeper each connection after last. Better through fsikure. Love isnt lost. Just easier to forget with the tick of marching heartbeat

Cropped circles

Tirelessly tired
4am again
wired
Fed up waiting in line to end up where we stsrted
Hired only to be fired
Head west for now
Look back
 Passanger side flashback
Stacking stacks of collapsing traps
Everything that keeps em together is falling apart
Designate a space to waste
Come together by tearing apart
Revolve in place 
Sip dont taste
Hurry to wait
Love to hate
Disappear but leave a trace
Contradict agreeably
Or not
At least willingly disagree we cant agree that argument maybe
The last fun activity for human beings
From this devils are made
Evil born of good wombs
Nutured naturally
Raised an enemy
Loved by all
Living inside me

Dear diary, go fuck yourself

I havent wrote
Lets try something new

Blue
Morning draped
Escape
Late again
Shake sleep off
Again
Mistress made of thousands of threads
Instead of surrendering to the safe blanket place
Warm embrace of womb like state
Traded daily in haste for black coffee
Fuel for the freeway races
To return again
at later dates
After much debate
We lie in beds made
Wishing for death
Or something like it
Halfway between breathing
And dream weaving

Turn it off
Then back in
Should work now