Wednesday, February 21, 2018

Legs

I fall in love
Everyday
Tripping
So they say
Without anchor we fly
Left our cares an unaswered why
By and by we buy time
Plowing forth mile after mile
Butterflies trapped in side
Flutter when you walk by
Think ill try
Bit of Thy
Temptuious thighs

Saturday, February 17, 2018

Fades

Maybe I'm a price of s
Least I'm good looking
Might have a taste for destruction
Masked eloquently in sarcasm
Could be wrong about the right I make believe
Should be quarantined
Mayhap the me in me was always disease
Despite the lighting
Staging
The Soundtrack
Intermission
Choregrographed reprive
A lifetime half lived
Swearing like a sailor
At the sailboats
Chatting through the trees
I remeber to forget
Steep wooded mountains
Briars patched like traps
Making vagabond trespassers nests
Cliffs high as death
Hunched over lakes warm as baths
Green
Far as the eye could see
Trouble behind every poison leaf
Sticks
Boondocked land lover
Striding gracefully at ease
Past lives
Not me
Another I before
Wood chopper
Roof maker
Dareing the devil himself
To appease
And there was light
Sometimes
Snow, during the freeze
Boredom that would suck the marrow from bone
Now just stories we never tell
Wars we survived
Scars that never heal
Specifically I couldnt say
It was just, then
While this here, is now
Who can say really?
Who would want to?
Sometimes the surface ripples and recollection strikes like a slap
Then its gone
Home
Maybe forever
Waiting
For no good reason to remind
Capture
Then fade


Round and round

Worthwile exchanges be rare
If you ask me
Occasionally, they find
Rile
Intrigue
You know
The hard stuff
Unanswerable questions
Unavoidable debate
Emotional defeat
Eventually
Again I captured willing participants
If only briefly
Conversing
Disagree

If I ruined the fun
Stated straight up
What I believe
You would organize a lynch mob
Castrate me in the streets
What fun could we have if you knew
That my motivation to contradict
Comes directly from whatever you think you think

Philosophers are raging dickheads
It is known
Assuredly not intentionally
Uncontrollably, yes
No rational being sets course towards endless conflict
Friendless journeys
The empiest alone reserved for unpopular
Unwanted
People like me

My new friend and I spoke in length
About this here
That there
Dug trenches together
Planted firm on opposites sides of a sideless shape
Up until chords struck
Never mind
Regrettably
The button uncovered
Exposed
Mashed like an arcade joystick
Then they take offense
Then the crowd becomes concernd
Fear mounts
Fighting appears inevatable
That's the most important moment
When you really puss someone off
Out of comfort zone
Rattled and birthing fury

It delights and saddens me
To reach another's point
Cross the line
Tap into the core behind the bullshit

I might never have friends
Will probably view every thing
With condescension
Belittle if allowed
All and any
Every
Not to anger
To oppose
Never to persuade or push
Anything at all
The weak agree
Accept
Gods defy
Create
Destroy
Laugh
At us
You
This
Now
Why then
Have I not found
Like me
Against you
For nothing
Surely it wasn't heard when I said it
Fuck love, Fuck god, Fuck all that is good and most importantly, Fuck you
There I am again
Surrounded by beauty
Desperately seeking anyone to validate
The opposition
The yang
I'm ranting
Wanted to go beyond the barrier
Into unknown unthinkable
No one ever so far
Not really
Has seen the forest for the trees

Anything
That's what I would give
For it to be known
Its not an attack
I couldn't care less what you've convinced yourself to believe
If you stand by anything I applud
Ill test it to be sure
If that upsets you, its obvious you dislike another questioning the lies you tell yourself

I learn
See the way I bring offense
Unhappiness
Am disgusted by inabilities to control it
Take a moment
Breathe
Look around
At them
Nice as they seem
Pretty little biology
That will cut your throat
Rape your ass
Or just pretend to be nice
Because that's the thing to do

I don't like you
Don't like me much either
Thank me for it
Send a prayer to chaos
Nod your head to despair
Care for death
Hug the black
Fight for wrong
Embody evil
Go forth and cull a righteous independent path
Go against
Try it
Fuck everything
In the ads
Laugh and laugh
Its the only worthwhile waste of time and space

Worse case scenario, you conquer fear its






Goober queen

E,

You gave me everything I craved. All my desire. Had my undivided attention. Became my most treasured human. That feeling never dissipated. Will remain glorified on high, until my sun fades. None can take away the day by day chortle our life created.
 Beyond pained rejection
Endless internal reflection 
Hides a familiar affection

Out of all the worlds 
Defiant to all the other infinite possibilities
We were 
I and you
And love
Unbelivably silly shared essence of a drug that makes air worth breathing
Something worth believing

 Emotions regress me
I say and act a fool
Inflict hurt unnesarilly
As terrible it is
This is what validates my love
No matter what is said 
You moved me
A man that swore off live forever
Enemy of monotony
Carry that always
Its me
What I gave reluctant
What you begged 
What you won

You need to know this
Because I failed to show you
Or you failed to accept
Changes nothing
It cuts red ribbons off me to think you somehow didnt know? Wasn't enough. 
Neither excuse or apology I offer. Sorry for nothing. Left grateful yet bitter but not at you. No series of puntuated words will encompass what you'll never know you are and were to me. 

You always deserve betyer
Proud you took a stance about it
Excited for your romantic and all around future
Here if you need me 

You meant the world
Was my world
After everything
I fell on valentines
A year ago
For you
I went after it
Storms came and went
Our ship never sank
Hard work and love were used like tools
So much amazing acheviments you made 
Nursed me back from the edge
Rehabed my dead and lost heart
I will always be grateful
You will always be my muse
What we made, will always be one of the best chapter of my life

I dont want you back
You should want me
We both grew apart 
None of that is bad
You said I sucked at the end
Maybe
I sucked the whole time
I hope you feel the same one day
Blissed out that I met you
That you stole my attention
No easy feat
We created a connection 
Friendship
A team

Sorry for being hurt 
Our anniversary 
Valentines
Your ruthless
I like it
Had it coming
Not going to let it paint over what to me
Was a relationship that turned into me falling in love with an amazing person that showed me care I never deserved.

I'm still trying to sum up a feeling I have had for you since we met. Failing. Perhaps you know it. Felt it. If so, try not to forget. Everything. All of it. The story of E and K. 

Miss you to. Dont send song lyrics. I hate crying. Its gross.

Farewell to waking up together. Hello to being apart but still the team we always were.

Death almighty alrighty

For the record
So it is writ 
So it is known

I do not wake daily consumed by hating
Despite what I told you
Those am moments I am pleased 
Find me singing through the trees
Tapping my raps trapped echoed back
Her sultry salted sea

By noon, I'm high like sunshine
Beating bitter thought
Discharging protons

By close of business
Find me homicidal
Ready and begging 
For oblivions embrace
Cold unconcerned

Cheers to my good hearts
Defenders of live
Warriors of right

Find me at night
Find me careless and itching for a fight 

Thursday, February 15, 2018

Good grief

Your a clown
Good luck kid
Lame hooked
Prostitute unconstitutional
Just because
The home in your lower half
Is bigger than your heart
Go with the wind
By breeze we welcome what will
What begs
To please
Go be
Free
Without this connection
Bereaved
Basically done walking this life
By me

Friday, January 5, 2018

I lost my best friend
To betrayal
To a lie
Of love
I'm sick
Rather die
Than keep waking up
Under her sky